1. Asking how someone is doing is mere pleasantry. The correct answer is "I'm doing fine, how are you?" The correct response to this further querry is also "I'm doing fine." It is not an excuse to say "I'm not doing fine and it's your fault."
2. When someone asks if there is anything else you need, don't say something idoitic like "How about a million dollars." or "You could pay my bill for me."
3. Do not have your phone set up so that person you are talking to hears feedback of what they just said a second after they actually say it. This can cause headaches and homocidal rage.